Tobias informs me that from time to time Next Face receives e-mail from the faithful that should be posted. In that spirit and to get the week off to a fun start I will begin this week with the following post.
Is it just me or has the initial enthusiasm for Michael Ignatieff tapered off. It seems that after hearing his speeches and seeing him in couple of interviews people see him basically as a bright guy but not quite ready for the show. He has not wowed them in the House of Commons and people are wondering if what the Liberal Party needs is a repatriated Canadian who supported the war in Iraq and has never been elected to anything. Maybe wanting to be Prime Minister of Canada without putting in your dues is a bit presumptuous. And for all those who disagree try to post a comment which does not make reference to the following: Pierre Trudeau, Intellectual or Harvard. Can somebody please explain to me how this man is ready to be Prime Minister of Canada?
Love him or hate him you cannot ignore that, by far, Bob Rae had the most impressive kick off. More people attended than I expected and he definitely had some heavy hitters out to support him. Even if Bill Davis claims that he is still going to vote for Stephan Harper his attendance at the launch did much to dispel the notion that Bob Rae was an incompetent boob as premier. People have got to simmer down when it comes to recalling the Rae years in office. It was not as bad as people say it was.
To borrow from Seinfeld, “What is the deal with Gerard Kennedy?” Sure he looks good on TV and yes he’s young but I have to say his French was bloody far from making him the bilingual candidate we were promised. His French is nowhere near as good a Stephan Harper’s and it falls far short of the “Joe Clark Line” that I would suggest is the bare minimum for a leader of a Canadian political party. He is barely known outside the GTA and I hear him speak and I ask myself, what’s the rush kid. I mean can’t he put in a little while longer as a minister and then try and get elected as an MP. Does he always have to run for leader? Its as if he is mentally hardwired to enter every leadership race that comes along. Billy Joel once sang, “Slow down you crazy child, you’re so ambitious for a juvenile.” Ditto for Scott Brison.
Is Stephane Dion becoming the proverbial paper tiger. Come on man write a letter or something because you are slowly becoming forgotten.
Where have you gone, Stephan Dion,
Our party turns it's lonely eyes to you.
What's that you say, Mrs. Robinson.
Jolting Steve has left and gone away,
Hey hey hey.
Memo to Ken Dryden: Seriously man what the hell are you trying to say? When I hear you talk about putting the “Canada back into Canada” I have no idea what you mean. You remind me of a cerebral Jean Chrétien. You remember him, he of the, “if my mother had wheels she’d be a bus” fame and off course the classic “A proof is a proof. What kind of a proof? It's a proof. A proof is a proof. And when you have a good proof, it's because it's proven" riff. But Ken baby you gotta loosen up. I want to know if you ever spoke to your fellow hockey players like that and if so how many wedgies were you given to go along with all your Stanley Cup rings.
Speaking of Jean Chrétien there are moments I salivate at the prospects of the ol’man coming out of retirement to reclaim the title a la George Foreman. Imagine, if you will, JC explaining to Martha Hall Findley that before you have illusions about becoming Prime Minister of Canada you should have been elected to something or at least have been given a ministerial briefing. Let us all close our eyes and imaging the following conversation:
MHF: I’m running for Prime Minister
JC: To what do you want to be Prime Minister?
JC: You mean the one with the Rocky Mountains?
MHF: Yeah that one.
JC: But you know for me you hafta to have beaten Belinda Stronach first and become a parliamentary secretary and then you know maybe become minister of all the different positions and then you know help to save Canada and then joke with Rick Mercer at the Harvey’s.
MHF: But I’m bilingual
JC: But you know for me that was never such a big deal.
Martha Hall Findley: Please drop out.
To Mr. Bevilaqua, Mr. Volpe, and Ms. Bennett: You are all severely wasting out time. You remind me of the type of person who has read way too many positive self-improvement books and the next day decides to “self-actualize” and climb Mt. Kilimanjaro only to be left in a broken heap at the mountain’s base. To these candidates I say not one of you is ready to be Prime Minister and your delusional thinking cheapens the position.
I hear that there are rumblings of John McCallum running for leader. My advice: Don’t. Until you learn how to use a comb like a grown up and be able to explain how you allowed yourself to heckle Stephan Harper during the 2004 campaign you can never be leader. That’s right John we have not forgotten how you allowed Paul Martin and his team to treat you like their prison beeatch.
Let the race begin!